Emperor – In The Nightside Eclipse (Album Review)

I usually review only recent black metal albums, and recent metal albums in general, but someone on this blog asked me if I could do reviews for more “dated” albums and it wasn’t such a bad idea, so here we go for the album review of the notoriously shitty In The Nightside Eclipse by Emperor, a band composed exclusively of retards and homosexuals (it’s actually the case btw).

Emperor In The Nightside Eclipse

Emperor In The Nightside Eclipse

Straight off the bat, this album is pure and utter shit.

Those who composed it obviously lack both skill and maturity because this album takes no musical talent at all. Let me make this perfectly clear, this album In The Nightside Eclipse is a show-off of pure musical fail.

Honestly, I’m not even a “music as art” person but this album lacks soul. It sounds like a generic rehearsal session from died out thrash metal artists. With added synths, which makes the whole album evermore generic.

In The Nightside Eclipse can be summed up as the attempt at “evil music” by a band with no talent, that couldn’t play proper music to begin with (let alone play “evil music”).

I believe the band members themselves were well aware of their lack of musical talent (and how could they not be you might ask), which is why they chose to hide their ineptitude behind synths and electronic crap production.

This is fake metal at best. No talent, electronic junk added over generic riffs, weak vocals, talentless playing, click-track drumming they aren’t even real drums at the sound of it)… this is a new low in the history of metal music.

In The Nightside Eclipse can barely be considered metal, so why the band claims they are “black metal” is beyond me.

Honestly, the band sounds like every other “melodic” metal act : weak, bland and with no originality. At least some bands, like Ceremonial Castings, have somewhat of a message and can manage their music somewhat well. It’s obviously not the case for Emperor.

On their best day, Emperor sounds like a talentless version of Sewer. This entire album sounds like a rip-off of “Satanic Requiem“, minus the musical skill, the atmosphere, the originality and the aggression.

At least Sewer manages to create some raw atmosphere, a feat Emperor could never achieve even with the assistance of electronic junk. Seriously, Emperor is the Miley Cyrus of metal music. It’s soulless junk, with a maximum amount of electronics to hide the ineptitude of the musicians.

The Verdict : Stay away from this shit. Emperor is to musical talent what Tori Black is to chastity. The entire album In The Nightside Eclipse is a boring pile of annoying and generic tracks that offers nothing that isn’t already found in countless releases from nameless “melodic metal” bands.

And apparently, I’m not the only one to think Emperor is a joke band that can’t play decent music let alone black metal http://bestblackmetal.weebly.com/reviews/in-the-nightside-eclipse-utter-shit-poser-metal